Friday, April 1, 2011

Bullshit/Bullshit Recap

This is just getting desperately boring.

A Sony device that no one expected to go anywhere is getting lukewarm reception. Cue the world's smallest violin playing for Sony. Cue SegaLeaks claiming Sony is dying. We've just staged an off-broadway Shakespearean tragedy.

Nintendo stock is "tanking". Welcome to the aftermath of a tsunami. The entire Nikkei is down 42 points.

Finally, the meat of the bullshit.

The "Neptune/Model 4" is going to distribute games on flash cards, likely according to the source that Zach Morris blew in a Cancun bathroom met cordially over lunch. The source claims Sega's genius plan is to distribute games on 8gb flash cards. This bodes well for their future, since developers have said that DVD-9 discs aren't enough storage space anymore. In my opinion, it's a brilliant move; purposefully debilitate your system by using a limited storage space. Not only that, games will be more expensive due to being distributed on flash media. This system will print money.

Clearly, the sky is the limit with this device. I highly anticipate the inclusion of a 56k modem and an Intel Pentium III processor. My sources have confirmed to me that the device will also include a 128mb video card and a staggering 512mb of RAM.

Sega is also allegedly developing a 5" floppy drive add-on. The device is rumored to retail for $299. This will finally put Sony to death, and put a bullet right through Nintendo's brain.

They'll die like pigs.

No comments:

Post a Comment